Helping Children Cope with Divorce by Edward TeyberNot a book everyone needs or would want to read, but if youre in this unfortunate situation, it is packed with very helpful advice in a slim paperback volume. It gives script examples of what to say for all the awkward and difficult questions that come up when talking about divorce and how to help kids grieve. I am keeping it close at hand to refer to over an over in the year ahead as we struggle through this difficult path. This, along with Moms House, Dads House and must-have volumes for couples with children going through the divorce process.
How to Tell Kids About Divorce
There are few harder moments in parenthood than telling your kids that it's over between mommy and daddy. As a divorce attorney, I have seen hundreds of families struggle over how to break this news to their children. The process should involve calculated timing by the parents, a scripted statement explaining why it happened and a sketch of what is going to happen to the family in the future. There is no use trying to avoid the issue: this part of the process is far worse than when you told your spouse that you wanted a divorce, mostly because the recipient of this pain is a child. I would caution divorcing parents to be very careful about how they talk to their children about the "D" word.
One of the most stressful concerns of someone facing a divorce is telling the children. This article provides information to separating parents regarding: How to tell your children you will be separating and divorcing, What to tell them, and When to tell them, whether the upcoming separation and divorce will be amicable, or difficult. That will mean you will have a home with Mom, and a home with Dad.
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Don: Separation Talk Script Guidelines., But preparing to tell my son that I will be divorcing his father was absolutely one of the worst. Thinking about breaking the news filled me with dread, not to mention gut-wrenching fear, anxiety, incredible guilt, and the oppressive weight of shame.
By John Hoffman May 1, Two thoughtful parents once sat their preschooler down to tell him about their upcoming divorce. Carefully and gently, they told him that Mommy and Daddy were going to stop living together and would now live in different houses, but he would still see both of them regularly. They finished with the most important point of all, that Mom and Dad both still loved him, and asked if he had any questions. This little story, related by California psychologist, mediator and author Joan B. Kelly, provides a window into the differences between adult and child experiences of divorce. These parents had done all the right things.
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