Opinions Of Others Quotes (88 quotes)
How To Stop Caring What People Think
Why “Stop Caring What People Think” Is Terrible Advice If You Have Social Anxiety
We carefully pick out what we wear to the gym to make sure we look good in the eyes of the other gym goers. We post only the best picture out of the twenty-seven selfies we took and add a flattering filter to get the most likes to prove to ourselves that we are pretty and likable. And all it does is make us judge ourselves more harshly. It makes us uncomfortable in our own bodies. It makes us feel apologetic for being ourselves.
We get by. Think about a time when you were extremely anxious — say, before standing up to publicly speak, raising your hand in a big meeting, or even walking through a room of strangers. The reason you felt small and scared and tense is you were worried about social disapproval. A craving for social approval made our ancestors cautious and savvy; thousands of years ago, if the responsibility for the failed hunt fell on your shoulders, your place in the tribe could be threatened. The desire to fit in and the paralyzing fear of being disliked undermine our ability to pursue the lives we want to create.
Do you find yourself constantly worrying about what others think of you?
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The doctor listens intently to his problems and symptoms. Then, after carefully considering the potential causes, he tells the patient:. But part of the definition of social anxiety is a feeling of being negatively judged or evaluated. This is a symptom of the problem — not the cause. Even books written by experts teach the same idea, in one form or another.